Embracing the empty nest

One day you're changing diapers and the next your baby is graduating from high school. For 18 years or more, you’ve been managing carpools, homework, and extracurricular activities. And then, suddenly, you’re buying twin XL sheets and dropping your child off at college.

Or maybe your teens are still living at home, but their independence has left you feeling a bit lonely. The once chatty kids in the passenger seat barely wave as they head out the door with the car keys.

If you're struggling with this new season in your life, here are some ways you can address empty nest syndrome and find yourself again.

• Practice self care. After years of caring for your family, it’s time to focus on your own well-being. You may have more time for a regular fitness activity, like yoga, running, or walking. Meditation and journaling are good ways to alleviate stress and set positive affirmations for your day. While you may be cooking for just one or two people, be sure you focus on nutrition and healthy eating. Just think … you can cook what YOU like!
• Pursue your interests. You finally have more time to focus on the things you enjoy. Take this time to explore new interests. Start by creating a bucket list of things you’ve always wanted to do or try. You may find that you want to take up tennis or golf, learn to speak a new language, travel, volunteer or even spend time working towards a new career aspiration. The possibilities are endless, so get creative.
• Reconnect with friends. Perhaps you were so absorbed in parenting that you lost touch with many of your friends. Or, your social circle revolved around your children’s activities and now you’ve lost those connections. It’s time to focus on re-building your social network. Invite friends for coffee, plan a night out, join a book club or workout group. Just like when you joined a new-parent group years ago, it's helpful to be around other empty nesters who can validate what you're going through. And, if you have a partner, it's fun to go on dates again and reconnect as a couple.
• Give yourself grace. You do not have to become a new person overnight. Start by setting small, manageable goals until new habits begin to form, taking the place of routines that centered around your child. You’re probably a pro at managing the family calendar. Take the time to schedule your own life and include free time for yourself so your days remain purposeful. Most importantly, pat yourself on your back for raising independent children who are ready to fly.
• Reach out for help. It's not uncommon for people to feel stressed or anxious when their kids move out. If you're feeling a sense of loss, you are not alone. Allow yourself to grieve and feel sad. You may want to contact a mental health professional who can help you process your feelings and offer support. With some patience and self-care you can embrace your empty nest and find joy in this new chapter.